


a little fall of rain (can hardly hurt me now)

by WhoTheBuckIsStucky



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: ??? it's not really a gang it's just like......rich families Doing The Most, Angst, Gang!AU, Hurt No Comfort, I Love Suffering Don't You, M/M, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-09
Updated: 2018-07-10
Packaged: 2018-12-13 04:50:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11752380
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhoTheBuckIsStucky/pseuds/WhoTheBuckIsStucky
Summary: Kris Wu has been his father's puppet and disappointment from day one. He is reclusive and has taken to drinking. Do Kyungsoo is his family gem but he wants a way out of the life he was born into. The two of them meet anonymously, and fall in love even though their families are rivals due to some unspeakable argument between their fathers. Can their love or, for that matter, they themselves, survive it?





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> hello kiddos im back with some fuckin uhhhhh mcbullshit that no one asked for!!!

**One • Kris**

 

Kris awoke to a sharp rap on his door.  The noise reverberated in his skull; he groaned and squeezed his eyes shut. 

"Young master, your father requests your presence in the family dining room."

"Tell him I'll be there in five minutes," Kris croaked back, blindly feeling for the glass of water he had placed on his bedside the night before. He pushed himself up into a sitting position. His head spun and he nearly dropped the glass. "Fuck," he muttered, taking a drink to wet his mouth before slowly opening his eyes. 

Kris knew his hangovers were always terrible but he never took precaution against them. Instead, he drank until he wouldn't remember what he was drinking and then left his morning self to deal with the consequences. 

He grabbed the few pills--for the pain and nausea--that were on the bedside and tilted his head back to throw them in his mouth, washing them down with the rest of the water. 

He sat for a few more moments, and then gave standing a try. He swayed, but he remained upright, so he took a few staggering steps to his bathroom. He scrubbed his face with cool water and then brushed his teeth quickly. Feeling a little bit more stable, he ducked into his closet and found a dress shirt and pants, and then brushed his hair back with his fingers without looking in the mirror. Grabbing his phone and putting it in his back pocket, he pushed the oak door of his bedroom and stepped out into the hallway. 

He had no idea what time it was, but judging by the number of serving people running about, it was nearly midday. Kris didn't wish to go back for his watch, so he instead lumbered in the direction of the dining room, shielding his eyes against the bright sunlight streaming in through the large windows. 

A servingwoman bowed him into the dining room. His father was seated facing the door at the head of the table, absently swirling a glass of what appeared to be some kind of hard liquor while looking over a spread of documents on the table before him. He did not raise his head when Kris entered. 

"Father, you asked to see me."

"Yes. According to my sources, the Dos have come to China on business. We must be careful--they may try to take control of our allies. I need you to go to a ball. It's three days from tonight, and it's a masquerade, for young people, so you can easily find information for me--" at this, Mr. Wu finally looked up from his papers to meet Kris's gaze, "or, you could if you were sober."

Kris set his jaw.

"They're dangerous, and they have a lot of influence in Korea. We can't let them take what we have here. You can find out what they really want--we all know that when powerful families like theirs and ours go to foreign countries 'on business', there's always more to it than just that."

"There are more powerful Chinese families than just us," Kris pointed out. "How do you know they aren't here for the Zhangs, say, or--or the Huangs, especially?" 

"That's what I need you to find out," his father said cuttingly. "If they don't want to bother with us, then we won't need to spend so much time and resources looking out for them. But if they are... a stitch in time, indeed..."

"Alright," Kris said. He hated going to parties where he wasn't allowed to drink, but at least since this was a masquerade ball, he could remain anonymous.

"Good. You're going to the tailor this afternoon to have a suit and mask fitted. The foyer, three o'clock." His father looked back down at the documents once more, and Kris took that as his dismissal. 

Kris was part of what his father liked to called a powerful family, but he thought gang, or perhaps mafia, was more accurate. They were rich, they held influence over the government and many businesses, and they got away with high crime because of it. As the heir, Kris certainly had responsibility, but he also had a lot of free time, and access to things someone his age perhaps should not. 

But it was the same in all the families he knew of, with the exception of the Zhangs (somehow, Yixing, who was just a couple years younger than Kris himself, was not a single bit corrupt). But Zitao, the heir of the Huangs, a particularly rich empire, smoked incessantly; Luhan owned brothels all across northeastern Asia and was rarely seen without multiple women by his side. 

However, though he spoke the language, Kris's knowledge of the Korean families was a little lacking. If he remembered correctly, Kyungsoo was the name of the heir of the Dos, and he was said to be prone to violence, but that was all Kris knew of him. He assumed he would be at the ball as well, seeing as he too was around Kris's age, maybe a bit younger, but Kris doubted he would be able to pick him out of the crowd. 

He had reached his room. The time on the clock on his bedside read 1:47. 

 _Perfect_ , Kris thought wryly.  _Enough time for a drink and some food, then, before the tailor's._

 

 

**One • Kyungsoo**

 

Kyungsoo shut his eyes against the head-whirling dips the plane was taking as it was buffeted by the wind and clouds. Below, Seoul's landscape grew smaller and smaller until they broke through the cloud cover and everything was white. The plane flattened out and he reopened his eyes to see his mother handing him a ginger ale. 

He accepted it wordlessly and settled into his seat. It wasn't a terribly long flight to Guangzhou, and he planned to spend the time reading. He wouldn't get much peace when they landed; his father had deals to make and a tense party with the head of the Wu house to attend, while Kyungsoo himself was to get information at a masquerade ball, where the Wu heir was supposed to be as well. 

Kyungsoo's Chinese was not the best, he would admit. But it was enough to be relatively charming, and to understand what other people were speaking about, if he paid close enough attention. 

"Do you want champagne?" His father offered a flute to him, but Kyungsoo shook his head. 

"I don't want to be nauseous."

His father shrugged and turned to offer it to his uncle instead, and Kyungsoo buried himself in his book.

They landed and were immediately whisked off to their hotel. It was late and Kyungsoo collapsed onto his bed in their suite and fell asleep. 

The next morning Kyungsoo took breakfast in his room. He was often accused of being quite antisocial and he supposed the accusers were right. He was dreading the ball. He despised talking to strangers for so long, especially frivolous, idiotic ones, but he had to, in order to help his family. He wasn't exactly sure what his father had planned for this trip, but he was sure he'd either read about it in the papers on the flight home, or unknowingly reap the benefits once they returned.

His father sent up a new suit and a mask in the afternoon. He tried them on; they fit, as expected. The mask was a delicate red, covering his whole face, since his lips were rather distinctive. The tie to his suit matched. The suit was all black, including the shirt, and his tie matched the mask in color. It was nice, but Kyungsoo couldn't help but loathe its use. 

The ball was the next evening, and it loomed palpably. Kyungsoo spent the day brushing up his Chinese and meeting some of his father's Chinese connections, and then he napped in the early afternoon so that he could be alert at night. 

His mother came in once he was dressed and fussed over the fit of the suit and comfort of the mask. 

"You'll make your father proud," she said, her eyes glittering. "He needs you to learn as much as possible tonight. He has some unfinished business with the Wu family, but after these few months, it will all be over and our family can finally be free from theirs."

"What unfinished business?" Kyungsoo asked, but his mother only smiled and straightened his tie, and did not meet his questioning gaze. 


	2. Two

**Two • Kris**

 

Kris turned in the mirror, studying his reflection. The grey mask only covered the upper half of his face, stopping at the tip of his nose and just ghosting over his cheekbones. The traditional black and white suit was tight-fitting to show off Kris's leanness.

It was likely he may be recognized anyway, he realized. Not many young heirs were as tall as he was. But he supposed if he stayed seated most of the time, in the dark it might be harder to tell. 

"Young Master, are you ready?"

Kris straightened his tie. "Yes," he said, turning to the door of his room. The serving man stepped in and looked him over. 

"Very well. The car is waiting."

Kris followed him down the long halls of the mansion, and down the stairs to the front drive. The serving man opened the door and Kris scooted himself inside and settled back against the leather seats. 

The drive to the ball took a half an hour. Kris watched the city whizz by, and wished for a drink. He looked around surreptitiously but it seemed that his father had ensured the car had been stripped of its usual comforts. Disgruntled but not surprised, Kris took to rating the young men passing by in his head instead. 

Kris liked girls, of course, make no mistake, but there was something else about boys that he couldn't quite put his finger on but that he enjoyed. Maybe it was that they were easier for him to understand. Whatever the reason, he liked watching them. 

Eventually, they reached the mansion. Other young, extravagantly-dressed people were getting out of cars, laughing and talking, all flooding to the front doors. Kris took a breath and stepped out into the chaos. He kept his head down as he joined the throng of bodies, keeping his ears pricked for any mention of his family or the Dos. 

"--but their tarts are divine--"

"--only that gown was so last season, I could scream--"

"--apparently the Lius are going bankrupt, if you'll believe it--"

"--I'm going to be tripping over this train all evening--"

"--the Do boy is here, his father is going to a luncheon with Mr. Wu and a few others tomorrow--"

That was news to Kris. Maybe they had just arranged it. 

"--meet Kris Wu, perhaps?"

Kris jumped a little and tried to find who the voice belonged to. 

"It's a masquerade ball, Xueyin, like you'll recognize him."

"You never know. Besides, I hear that when the Dos are done here, they'll be in ruins."

"Oh, stop, the Wus are a much older family. The Dos can try, certainly..."

_Try what?_ Kris wondered, vaguely concerned. Was that Kyungsoo kid going to try something, tonight? At least he had some confirmation that they were indeed after them. In what way, though, Kris didn't know. 

He finally reached the doors and pushed himself inside. Music swelled in the space above the rush of voices and clinking glasses, and Kris let himself be swept along the flow of bodies until he entered the main hall. 

It was dimly lit and richly decorated. Kris quickly found himself a table in a corner, not wanting to exhaust himself with dancing so early when a lot of the guests had yet to arrive. It was easier to overhear more when there were more people dancing around him. 

_They'll be in ruins_. Kris thought back to what he heard as he was entering.  _Financially? Or in all senses of the word? Surely they wouldn't try anything so rash--like an actual attack, would they?_

And yet, Kris couldn't really find it in himself to get too worked up over it. He'd report it back to his father, certainly, but it was just a rumor. That was all. 

 

 

**Two • Kyungsoo**

 

Kyungsoo hated crowds. He was very short, much to his frustration, so he always got pushed around in them, and he could never see where he was going. 

A few paces ahead of him, a tall, lean man in a top half silver mask was easily moving along. Kyungsoo scowled to himself, glad no one could see his face.  _He has no idea how lucky he is._

Finally, Kyungsoo was inside the main hall. The noise was ridiculous--  _have any of these people ever considering shutting up and being quiet sometimes, or at least lowering their damn voices?_

Even in the low lighting, the room glittered. It was a little dizzying and Kyungsoo could only hope he didn't develop a migraine from it all. 

By the time he got in, most of the tables were already filled. He scanned the room for an empty spot somewhere tucked away. The table in the very corner was occupied by none other than the tall man with the grey mask from earlier. It was a large table, and he was the only person sitting at it. 

_Perhaps I can get some information out of him, at any rate,_ Kyungsoo thought.  _And if not, he seems to be the type that would be perfectly fine with sitting in silence, or maybe sharing a drink. Who knows?_

After a few moments of hesitation, Kyungsoo made his way over to the table.

"May I sit here?" he asked. 

The other man looked up at him in surprise, and then just shrugged and nodded. 

Kyungsoo took the seat opposite and gazed out across the grand hall, and then turned back to the other man. "So," he said carefully, testing the waters. "Not too social, either, then?"

"No," the other man said, and Kyungsoo was surprised by how deep his voice was. 

"Why are you here then?" Kyungsoo asked, curious. 

The man was silent for a while, and then just finally sighed and spread his hands. "My father wanted me to come and make some connections."

"Well, now you can tell him you did." Kyungsoo offered his hand to shake, which the other man took after a pause. His hand practically swallowed Kyungsoo's. "I'm here for the same reason," he continued, choosing to ignore the fact that one of this man's hands was larger than his face. "But I'm not planning on being terribly responsible either. Can I get you a drink?" He nodded at the bar. 

The man considered this for a long time--Kyungsoo got the impression that he was having a debate with himself. 

"That would be great," he said at length. "Do you take champagne?"

"Yes. I'll get us a bottle, then."

"I prefer dry, and not sweet."

"Fine with me," Kyungsoo said. He did personally prefer sweeter dessert champagnes to anything else, but if he wanted to get drunk, their low alcohol content wasn't going to cut it. Kyungsoo rose and headed to the bar and asked for a bottle and two flutes. 

"Thank you," the man said when Kyungsoo passed him his glass. 

Kyungsoo nodded and raised his to toast. "To disappointing our fathers."

A dry smile broke out across the other mans face, and he clinked his glass against Kyungsoo's. "That's always something I can drink to," he said, and Kyungsoo laughed.

They chatted about nothing in particular, pausing to order more champagne at intervals. The night wore on, and Kyungsoo found himself taking a liking to the man. His dark humor matched Kyungsoo's worldview, but despite it, he seemed rather caring and sensitive, which was both intriguing and comforting. 

Somewhere around midnight, Kyungsoo realized he was more than just a little intoxicated. It seemed the other man was too, but he didn't really care. It was dark, and the time of night that people began to slip off in twos and threes to the rooms upstairs with full glasses in hand and maybe a pill of some kind pressed under their tongues, and for once Kyungsoo kind of wanted to be one of them. Maybe it was the champagne. Maybe it was his boredom, his worry, his want for distraction. But this man seemed attractive enough. And he seemed large, which is what Kyungsoo liked best, and he didn't seeming he'd be adverse to the idea. 

But he waited.  _I'm actually having fun. I don't want to scare him away._


	3. Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello im alive  
> I'm at college now which has really just been one wild ride. I'll give a full explanation when I finally post the last chapter of my most popular fic which is what I should be working on now but I'm a garbage fire so I'm not :)

**Three • Kris**

 

The boy in the red mask across from him was actually, if Kris had to say it, kind of delightful. He wasn't an optimistic person, as Kris wasn't, so he didn't have the overbearing perkiness that Kris so despised. But he was still very funny, and he could keep up with Kris both in conversation and in drinking. Kris couldn't see his face, but he seemed cute, almost--his hands were tiny, and he was short but obviously muscled. He seemed to be the kind of tiny, rage-filled human that Kris knew other tall, apathetic beings like himself tended to keep by their side.

He giggled to himself as his drunken mind supplied an image of him going up to his father with this boy the way a young child might go up to a parent with a stray puppy they picked up in the woods.  _Please can I keep him, Baba? Pretty please with a cherry on top?_

Kris also had to admit that depending on where he was and who he was with, he was either an angry drunk or a horny drunk, and right now he was definitively the latter. The hall was clearing a bit as other guests stumbled off together, and Kris intended on doing the exact same thing. Hopefully with the boy across from him, if at all possible. 

He and Kyungsoo were laughing at something, he forgot what. When he caught his breath a little, he grabbed one of Kyungsoo's hands. "Hey," he said. "Hey, do you wanna, like, go somewhere more private?"

The other boy's eyes glinted under his mask, and he nodded. "Absolutely."

Kris picked up theirs glasses and the boy took their bottle of champagne by the neck and followed Kris out of the room and to the stairs. 

They found an empty room. Kris flicked the lights off and put a layer of curtains down. He could barely make anything out in the darkness. The boy fumbled for his arm. 

"We're supposed to remain anonymous," he explained. 

"I know."

"Let's promise not to look to close at each other's faces, then. I can't kiss you with your mask on."

"Okay," the boy said with a giggle. 

Kris turned away to undo the knot buried in his hair. "We shouldn't say our real names. What should I call you?"

"U-um, anything is fine." Kris heard nervousness in his voice. 

"N-never mind," Kris said quickly. "It's okay." He turned to face the other boy again and found the faint outline of his face with his eyes. He cupped his chin and folded himself over so that they were nose to nose. "We don't need to." He kissed him softly, stumbling a little as they drew even closer, blind and drunk and dizzy from the dark and the champagne and the heat of each other's bodies. 

\+ + +

Kris woke to gentle sunlight and the sound of someone breathing beside him. He sat upright and took in the unfamiliar room, trying to will away the pounding in his head. Rubbing his eyes, he swung his feet over the edge of the bed and picked up his clothes, getting the other boy's as he went and tossing them into a semi-organized pile on the bed. He looked back at the other boy--he was facing away from him, tucked deep in the blankets. His soft dark brown hair picked up the light in such a pretty way. 

Kris shook his head, trying to collect his memories from the night before as he tugged on his pants and shirt, and then re-tied his mask. He remembered the smaller boy's hands on his chest, hovering above him, the softness of his lips, his breath in Kris's ear, mumbling, "I think I'd want to keep you no matter who you actually are" as they drifted off to sleep. 

_Me too_ , Kris found himself thinking. He'd never clicked with someone so well before. The sex, amazing as it had been, aside, he had enjoyed talking to the boy that night.

The sheets rustled, and Kris turned away. 

"You're still here," the boy said from behind him. 

"Yes," Kris replied softly. "Your mask is beside you."

"Yes." He heard fumbling. "You can turn around." 

Kris did so cautiously, and met the familiar red paint. 

"Your clothes are there," he said, pointing to the foot of the bed. 

"Thank you." They sat in silence as the boy got dressed. It was heavy and thick. Below, guests were piling into their cars and driving off once more. 

Kris bit the inside of his cheek.  _I don't want to leave_ , he realized, watching the lines of the boy's arms as he stretched.  _I want to stay here with him_. 

 

 

**Three • Kyungsoo**

 

Kyungsoo was grateful for the man's attention to privacy. He must have picked up on how hesitant Kyungsoo was to shed his anonymity and let him be about it. 

And yet, he wanted to know who this man was. He wanted to know him, wanted to be with him, even, maybe--

"We have to leave," the man said. 

"I don't want to," Kyungsoo confessed. 

"Me either."

"Will I see you again?"

"I... hope so."

"How?"

"...I don't know."

They were quiet. 

"Neither of us want anyone do know who we are. Can't we... just tell one another and promise not to say anything to anyone?"

The man recoiled slightly. "I don't think..."

"I want to get to know you," Kyungsoo insisted. "No matter who you are."

"Me, too," the man admitted. 

"We have time. Or..." Kyungsoo didn't like it, but it was better than nothing. "Or we can just exchange numbers."

"I'd rather know who I'm texting," the man said. 

They were silent again. 

"Why don't we take off our masks?" Kyungsoo reached for the tie on his. "Together. We'll count to three." 

"A-alright." The man moved his hand to the tie of his mask as well. 

Kyungsoo pinched his finger on one string of the bow. "One," he said. 

"Two." The man untied his but used his other hand to hold it in place. Kyungsoo did the same. 

"Three," he said, and they lowered their masks together. 

They stared at each other, blinking through the dust.

"You're... you're Kyungsoo. Do," the man said finally, weakly. 

Kyungsoo swallowed hard. "And you're Kris Wu," he whispered back. 

"This was a mistake," Kris said immediately, turning to leave. 

"Wait, wait." Kyungsoo reached out to him. "Ok, I'm a Do and you're a Wu, so what?"

"So what? So your family is here after mine."

"So maybe we can fix things. Maybe we don't have to be after each other. Maybe we can make our fathers make peace."

Kris laughed hollowly. "No way in hell will my father stop holding his grudges."

Kyungsoo sighed in defeat. "Neither will mine."

"So what do we do?"

Kyungsoo looked up at Kris, chewing on his lip. "I like you," he murmured. "I should be allowed that, right?"

Kris shook his head. "I don't know."

"Do you know why our families are so at odds, anyway?"

Kris sat down, still shaking his head. "I don't know. I don't know."

"Hey, hey." Kyungsoo took Kris's stupid big hands in his own tiny ones. "Listen, we don't have to let our fathers rule us, okay? They don't have to know. We--we can try it. We can text without them knowing. Maybe even meet up, if possible. You know? We can try."

Kyungsoo didn't know how to explain it. Kris made him happy. He made him laugh. His hands felt safe. He didn't know where it would take them, but he did know that he would regret it if he just let Kris go. 

"We can try," Kris agreed after thinking for a minute. "But we should go. Give me your number; I'll give you mine. We'll tie each other's masks and leave at different times. And we'll try."

So they swapped phones to put in contact information, and then put their masks back on. 

"You go first," Kyungsoo said. "I'll wait."

"Thank you." Kris stood and hovered, and then brought Kyungsoo's hand to his lips. "It was nice to meet you, Kyungsoo."

"You too." Kyungsoo let his hand drop into his lap and watched as Kris slipped out the door and shut it with a soft click behind him. Gone. Just like that. 

But then, his phone buzzed.

_Tell me when you get back to your hotel safely_. 

It was from Kris. Kyungsoo smiled. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ty for reading!!! check out my other work if ur interested! my tumblr is [right here](https://www.taeyeonsholidaynight.tumblr.com/ask) if you wanna yell at me to write faster!! it will probably help haha!! ^^"


	4. Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello I'm not dead I've just been busy. And stupid. Mostly stupid. Please enjoy. Thank you for your patience.

**Four • Kris**

 

Kris dragged his hand down his face, closing his eyes. He had discarded the mask on the seat beside him once they were out on the streets. 

_I can't believe this._

He knew he shouldn't have agreed to take off the mask in that room, but the boy, Kyungsoo--he liked him. He really did and he had no idea what to do with that. 

What could he do with it? If he was responsible and knew what was good for him, he would have never exchanged numbers, he would have never texted him as soon as he left the room like that. But Kris often found himself in a situation where his rational mind and impulsive mind were at odds, and his impulsive mind, unfortunately, usually won. And so it was. 

And Kyungsoo was right--they should try. Maybe it wouldn't work and that would be that, but it was better than never knowing. What was the worst thing that could happen, really? Their families find out, and--what? Maybe it would bring some peace. 

These thoughts brought him to the front of his mansion. Kris climbed out of the car, trying to look more alive than he felt. His father was waiting for him in the foyer. 

"So?"

"I found out that they are indeed here for us," Kris said as he slipped off his shoes, handing the mask to a waiting serving man. "Though in what way, I couldn't find out. Something about vengeance. I also found out that you're having lunch with Mr. Do later today." Kris met his father's gaze and raised his eyebrows. 

"Yes, we planned that quite last minute," his father responded delicately. "I'm trying to get a feel for the situation as well."

Kris had the distinct impression he was lying, but knew better than to call him out on it. 

"In any case," Mr. Wu continued. "You got something out of last night. Get some rest."

Kris nodded awkwardly, unsure how to react to the praise or the leniency, and made his way to his room. 

His phone buzzed as he shut the door. It was Kyungsoo. 

_Safe at the hotel. Missing you already, though._

Kris clutched the phone tight in his hand, rereading the message over and over. 

_I'm glad to hear it. I miss you as well._

He sent it and then threw his phone down on his bed and went to shower so that he wouldn't have to sit in agony waiting for a response. 

 

 

**Four • Kyungsoo**

 

Kyungsoo kicked his feet a little bit against his mattress when Kris's reply came through. He knew he should feel terrified, actually, but he could only feel giddy. 

_Do you want to video call sometime? I know our parents will be out this afternoon because of the lunch thing._

Kris didn't respond. Kyungsoo chewed at his bottom lip until it bled.

His mother had inquired about the night and Kyungsoo could only say that the Wus were aware and wary. She seemed to chalk it up to him being tired and told him to sleep. 

His phone buzzed and Kyungsoo snatched it up. 

_Sure. My father leaves in about an hour._

Kyungsoo grinned. 

_Mine too. I can't wait._

_Sounds good._

Kyungsoo spent the hour dozing with one hand on his phone. His father poked his head in to say that he was leaving for the lunch. He updated Kris on his father's departure and Kris responded that he was free as well. 

Kyungsoo plugged in his earphones as he accepted Kris's call. 

Kris waved sleepily on his screen. He looked like he'd taken a shower and changed into PJs.

"Hi," Kyungsoo said, waving back and smiling. 

"How'd things go with your parents?" Kris asked. 

"I answered vaguely and they left me alone. I think they were preoccupied with the lunch."

"Yeah, me too." Kris yawned. "So, tell me. What do you do, like for fun?"

"For fun?" Kyungsoo asked. "I like reading and music. And I cook."

"You cook?" Kris's eyes lit up. "You have to teach me. I'm terrible."

"As long as you're good at eating, I don't mind," Kyungsoo replied, grinning. 

Kris looked at him thoughtfully. "You know your mouth makes a heart shape when you smile."

"I know." Kyungsoo covered his smith with a hand. 

"No, don't, it's cute," Kris said.

"So what about you, then?" Kyungsoo asked, taking his hand away. "For fun?"

Kris took a deep breath and shrugged. "I drink and sleep. I'm pretty boring."

"Sounds nice to me," Kyungsoo said, settling back into his bed. 

"It's bad for me," Kris said. "But it's how I live."

"It just sounds like you don't have anything better to live for."

"Well," Kris said. "Maybe now I do."

Kyungsoo blushed and rolled his eyes. "One night, and you're already saying stuff like that, good god."

Kris just shrugged, giving him a lazy smile. "I'm glad we met, let's put it that way."

"Me too."

They sit there just watching one another for a few minutes. 

"I wish I could just kiss you," Kris murmurs. "But you're all the way... not here."

"Maybe we could meet somewhere sometime."

"I could smuggle you here this weekend, maybe. My parents are doing a business thing in a different district."

"Sounds risky."

"Yeah, but..." Kris scrunched up his face. "I know. But I also know... I'm not my father, you know? I'm not my father and I don't have to play by the rules he's confined himself to. I want to try to be happy."

"I do, too," Kyungsoo whispered, finding himself wondering how someone so like him, so willing to give him a hundred chances, could have ended up opposite him in his father's ruthless chess game. 

Kyungsoo didn't want to reap any benefits from this trip.  _In fact_ , he thought,  _I would rather die_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those of you who read my other fics, they will be updated before the end of the month that is a promise and if they are not you can come to my home and kill me. 
> 
> Along with those updates will come a link where u can buy me a coffee! this is non obligatory and I do not want you to feel pressured in any way to give me money. That being said, if you have 3 bucks to spare I would greatly appreciate it, as I am a tired college student in desperate need for spare cash. You have my word that the money will either go towards my caffeination (which will help me write more) or spoiling my girlfriend (which is something I want badly because she is an angel). 
> 
> As usual, find me on my tumblr [here!](www.exo-ot9stan.tumblr.com/ask) Thank you for reading!


	5. Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Im back!

**Five • Kris**

 

Kyungsoo was always on Kris's mind. He missed him whenever he wasn't talking to him, and it scared him. Normally he didn't care about much of anything, and suddenly this tiny boy with a heart-shaped smile was the only thing he saw when he closed his eyes. He wanted to be near him, to feel his fingers and his heartbeat and listen to him talk, about anything at all--

Kris figured it had something to do with being emotionally dead most of the time, because all that unused emotion was suddenly going into this one thing that he actually had real feelings about. It was a little terrifying to him, but it also made him feel giddy, and that was nice. He liked the way Kyungsoo giggled, the way his voice sounded when he was sleepy, his big, glittery eyes that held worlds Kris had never seen before. And he  _knew_ it was sappy, but somehow it didn’t disgust him the way the thought of it used to.

“You seem distracted,” his father mentioned one day at breakfast. 

“No,” Kris replied, shaking his head, half in vehement denial and half to clear it. “I’m fine. By the way, how was the luncheon with the Dos? You still haven’t told me anything about it.”

His father only grunted and went back to reading the paper.

Kyungsoo’s father had also not said anything to Kyungsoo about the lunch. Neither son could quite understand what there was to be so secretive about. What was going on, they both wondered, and would their families try making peace? What caused the rift to begin with? 

Kris zoned out again, thinking about all of this, and was shocked back into the present when his father slammed a fist on the table, shaking the silverware. 

“What is it?” Kris asked cautiously. 

“Those damned communists are out protesting against the power 'given' to families like ours. They’re all dusty peasants who are just too lazy to work for what we have, and want things to be equal on their own.” Kris’s father took an angry drink of whiskey. “If they want to live like us—but they think we are given too much power just because our families spent years clawing our way up—it’s all ridiculous. There will always be the more powerful and the less powerful. It’s the natural way of things; it’s the only way the world works. If you want to be more powerful, you have to rise up on your own instead of whining until the government feels like it has to take some kind of action to tear the hardworking down.”

“I mean, protesting is rising up, in a way,” Kris pointed out.

His father pointed his fork at him, sternly. “Don’t get smart with me. You know very well it’s not the same fuckin’ thing.”

“Yes, Father,” Kris said, ducking his head and finishing his breakfast.

Kris was still trying to figure out a way to sneak Kyungsoo into the house. He knew it would be much more risky if he went to the hotel, because neither of them knew the grounds very well, so it would be difficult for them to find an escape path if they were caught. However, Kris had been raised in this mansion. He knew some little passageways through the gardens, some hidden rooms. He could also tell their guards to look the other way. The question, primarily, was timing. Kyungsoo needed a good excuse to be out all night. Kris needed to find a way to feed him without people growing suspicious, and also to ensure that his father didn’t look down out of his study in the morning and see a strange boy sneaking into the bushes.

He had to see him, though. Surely, even if they  _were_ caught, his father wouldn’t just kill one of Kris’s friends on sight? Even if it was the son of one of his rivals?

_He wouldn’t,_ Kris thought to himself as he trudged back to his room.  _He has to know I wouldn’t forgive him for something like that, even if he is my father._ He nodded firmly.  _This weekend it is, then._

 

**Five** **• Kyungsoo**

Kyungsoo read the message over and over, unsure how to react.  _Can you get away this weekend?_ On the one hand, he was absolutely elated. Kris wanted him  _there_ , with him—he would get to see him face to face again, and it would be wonderful—but on the other hand, it was so dangerous. Where could he say he was going? He supposed he could say he just wanted to get some air, walk around the city, that he’d be careful and so wouldn’t need any guards—but he suspected his mother would send some after him, anyway.

Finally, he typed back,  _I can try to sneak out sometime. My parents have a dinner Saturday night that will probably go until late, so I don’t think they’ll check on me when it’s over._

_Try,_ Kris’s response read.  _I want to see you._

Kyungsoo smiled in spite of it all, getting little shivers up and down his arms. 

He wasn’t sure exactly what it was about Kris. He liked that he seemed big and broody at first, but as he had gotten to know him over the past few days, he was finding that there was a lot more to him than the alcoholic cool city man that he’d met the night of the ball. The Kris he’d gotten to know was clumsy, blushy, and kind. He sometimes didn’t think before he spoke, and he liked to draw even though he was absolutely terrible at it. His Korean was incredible and he also spoke English and Cantonese. Kyungsoo liked knowing that he was the only one outside of the Wu family, probably, who knew Kris was so smart.

Kyungsoo liked, also, feeling special when he talked to Kris. His family made him feel special, too, but in a sort of patronizing way. He was the heir, blah blah blah, and so they had to take care of him. And he was smart, and he did well for himself and by his father. But it was flat. With Kris—Kris made him feel precious. Kris made him feel like he, and he alone, not what his future could mean, not what he could do, not Do Kyungsoo but just Kyungsoo, was the most important thing in the whole world. The way he murmured softly to him during their phone calls, his attentive eyes when Kyungsoo spoke, his thoughtful texts—Kyungsoo knew. 

And so Kyungsoo began to organize his things, planning exactly what time he could “go out for a walk” and take a cab halfway across the city. Kris would be waiting for him at an outer garden wall where he could sneak him in. He couldn’t wait, and sometimes when he thought about it, it seemed like his heart was going to beat right out of his chest. Whether it was more out of excitement or anxiety, Kyungsoo wasn’t sure.

Saturday night arrived. Kyungsoo slipped out of the hotel at around six, just as the sky was beginning to get rosy, after his parents had left. He threw the large hood of the black sweatshirt he was wearing over his head to shadow his face, adding a black cough mask for good measure to hide his distinctive lips, and flagged down a cab. He gave him an intersection a few blocks from Kris’s house, and settled back into his seat.

_On my way,_ he texted to Kris.

_I’ll be waiting for you near the corner of the southeast wall,_ Kris replied.  _Can’t wait to see you._

Soon, the cab pulled up along a curb. Kyungsoo paid the driver, telling him to keep the change, and hurried out of the car and down the road. He rounded a couple of corners, and, just when he thought he was lost and it was time to panic, he saw a familiar tall figure leaning against a huge stone wall.

“Hello,” Kris said softly, his deep voice sending a shiver through Kyungsoo’s emotionally shocked body.

“Hello,” Kyungsoo greeted in reply, reaching out to take Kris’s extended hand. Beyond them, the tall walls of the Wu mansion rose up into the growing night, cold white glare shining out into the darkness. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank u for reading!!!!
> 
> I have set up a buy me a coffee. Again, I do not (!!) expect any of you to give me anything. If you can't spare anything or don't have a way to contribute or whatever other reason--it is okay. I get it, and honestly all I need are kind readers, which is what I already have a plethora of. That being said, if you DO have 3 bucks to spare, I would really appreciate it if you would. I am a struggling college student who runs on caffeine and love from friends she wants to spoil. You can Buy Me a Coffee [here](https://ko-fi.com/N4N47MXU)!
> 
> And as always, my [Tumblr](https://www.exo-ot9stan.tumblr.com/ask) is open for messages, requests, yells, life advice, anything!


	6. Six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> haha hi i'm back! no one reads this one but uhhhh the me it is. I'm going to be productive this time I swear. Stay tuned for more updates all across the board.

**Six • Kris**

 

Kris could barely contain himself, and when their hands touched, he pulled Kyungsoo into his chest, relaxing against the warmth of the smaller body. And yet—

“Your hand is so cold,” he murmured. 

“I forgot gloves.” Kyungsoo looked up at him sheepishly, moving to take off the black cough mask.

“Ah, not yet.” Kris caught his other wrist. “Best to keep your face concealed. I don’t think anyone will see us going in, but if they do I don’t want you to be recognized. My father knows I’m interested in men. I don’t think he’d ask too many questions if he saw me with an unknown boy."

Confusion flashed through Kyungsoo’s eyes. “You often bring boys here?”

Kris felt his heart do a little flip. “No!” he clarified. “I’m more a drunk than… anything else. I’ve only had one or two boys over. But I doubt my father would bat an eye. He has quite a low opinion of me, as you already know.”

“Oh.” Kyungsoo’s eyes cleared. “Alright then. Shall we… go?”

“Yes.” Kris brought Kyungsoo’s hands to his lips and pressed a kiss to his knuckles. “This way.”

He ducked through the small gateway, shutting the gate with a quiet clang, bolting and locking it. He led Kyungsoo through a pathway. Many plants grew above and around the path, climbing some metal arch structure his mother had installed many years back. They kept going until they reached an opening. To the side was a wall of the mansion, hidden behind a thick layer of ivy. 

“Here.” Kris held the ivy aside. “A few steps to the left will be a door. It’s unlocked. Wait for me just inside it.”

Kyungsoo giggled, and Kris’s heart sang. “It’s like a fairytale,” he whispered, ducking under the ivy. Kris followed, making sure the ivy was back in its unassuming place. He locked the passage door behind him, tucking the key safely back in his pocket before taking Kyungsoo’s hand once more and guiding him up the dim and narrow staircase. 

They climbed up to Kris’s floor, and he paused, listening at the door that exited into his closet. Everything was quiet, so he extracted another key and pushed the door open, careful not to let it creak. “Wait for me in there. Don’t come out till I say,” he breathed out to Kyungsoo, pointing to where many of his shirts hung. He turned back, re-locked the door, and then returned all the keys to the little chest on the wall. Next, he crept toward the door that opened out to his room. He peered out, and didn’t see anyone. He did a quick sweep of the room and then checked that the doors and windows were locked before going back to retrieve Kyungsoo.

“Is it safe?” Kyungsoo whispered.

“Yes,” Kris said in a slightly louder tone. “We’ll still have to be somewhat quiet, but even if anyone hears anything, I think _you_ being here would be the last thing they suspect. Come on.”

Kyungsoo followed him out into the bedroom. Kris heard him laughing and he turned and gave him a questioning look.

Kyungsoo subdued himself somewhat, shaking his head. “It’s nothing, it’s just that we both just… walked out of a closet… we came out of the closet… I’m sorry.”

Kris laughed. “You have no idea how many times I’ve thought that, when I go in to get clothes, or when I come back from the gardens through that door.” Suddenly feeling awkward, he gestured around him rather uncomfortably. “So, anyway, this is my room. Bathroom is that way; go ahead and use it. Uh, the grey towels are the ones I’ve used, but there are white ones hanging as well, so if you shower, you can use those. Oh,” he added, turning back to Kyungsoo. “Put that bag down, please. Anywhere. The floor. My desk chair. What did you bring, anyway?”

“A change of clothes, toothbrush, that kind of thing,” Kyungsoo replied, setting the bag in the desk chair like Kris suggested.

“You’re too cute,” Kris murmured, a surge of feeling swelling in his chest. He reached out and pushed Kyungsoo’s hood back, pulling down the face mask, and cupped Kyungsoo’s cheek in his hand for a moment before leaning in to kiss him. 

“I missed you,” Kyungsoo breathed out when they broke apart. “How is it that I miss you so much when I only met you once?”

“I don’t know,” Kris said, cradling Kyungsoo close, wrapping his tall frame around his small one. “I don’t know. All I know is I missed you, too. I wish you could stay here safely, forever. Or I could stay with you.” He felt some strange anxiety surface, probably over the strength of his emotions. He stamped it down. _Not the time._

 

 

**Kyungsoo • Six**

 

Kyungsoo’s lips tingled with the kiss still. He wanted more. He wanted everything. It was so unfair—so what the boy he loved was from a family his dad didn’t like? Why did he have to care so much? It wasn’t like it was a matter of life or death.

Kyungsoo squirmed himself taller in Kris’s grip, and pressed a kiss into his neck. Kris gasped in surprised, and then hummed lowly. 

“Why do I like you so much, huh?” he said, and Kyungsoo smiled in response. Kris leaned down to kiss him again, this time more fiercely and Kyungsoo kissed back, tasting his confusion and strange desperation, feelings Kyungsoo shared. _We might never get another chance to see each other before we leave. What if this is the last time? And we don’t know it?_

Kris knocked his forehead against Kyungsoo’s, startling him back into the present. “We’re both thinking too much,” he whispered. “Let’s just enjoy the time we have together, now, okay?”

“Okay,” Kyungsoo whispered back, staring big-eyed right back at him, happiness bubbling up in his chest.

Kris smiled, bright and open, just for him, and squatted down a little, tapping the backs of Kyungsoo’s thighs with his fingers. Kyungsoo hopped up, and linked his ankles behind Kris’s waist, his hands draped over Kris’s shoulders. Kris tilted his head back and pressed another kiss into Kyungsoo’s lips.

“I’m taller than you now,” Kyungsoo noted quietly.

“Yeah,” Kris replied. “What’s the view like?”

Kyungsoo looked down at Kris’s happy face, the sharp curve of his shoulders, and nodded. “It’s amazing,” he said. 

Kris back himself carefully to his bed and sat down, still cradling Kyungsoo close. 

“It’s funny,” Kris said. “Before you got here I was thinking I wouldn’t be able to keep my hands off you once you arrived. And I mean—” he nodded to how they were tangled in each other’s limbs. “I can’t. But not in that way. I want that—I’ve missed you, I said that—but I also just want to sit here, with you.”

“Like this?” Kyungsoo asked, settling into his lap.

“Like however. As long as I’m with you.”

Kyungsoo blinked. They were silent for a moment, just watching each other, tracing and retracing the lines of each other’s bodies, faces, eyes, holding each little shape close. Kyungsoo had never wanted to memorize someone this quickly.

Kris rubbed his back soothingly, occasionally giving him a gentle kiss on the cheek or the nose. Kyungsoo played with Kris’s hair, smiling when he closed his eyes against the soft pressure of the pads of Kyungsoo’s fingers. Everything felt right—Kyungsoo knew that perhaps he should be more wary of a man he had only met once, who was from a family he was supposed to hate, but—he couldn’t. 

“You don’t have to leave until tomorrow, right?” Kris confirmed.

“Early tomorrow morning, so I can slip into the room before my parents are up.”

“I’ll make sure you can get back in time. I don’t want you to get into trouble on my account.”

“I wouldn’t mind.”

“I would.” Kris smiled again and there was a sadness there. He shook his head and it disappeared. “Anyway.” He kissed Kyungsoo again, and Kyungsoo held on to the kiss, pushing Kris flat on his back on top of the soft duvet. Kris grinned and tugged upwards on the hem of Kyungsoo’s shirt. Kyungsoo raised his arms and helped Kris pull it off. Once it was discarded somewhere on the floor, Kris flipped them over and shed his own shirt, then bent over Kyungsoo and kissed his chest and stomach until Kyungsoo was breathless, gasping and laughing.

He looked up at Kris through half-moon eyes. His lashes blurred the edges of his vision, but Kris’s face, his body, his hands—they were crystal clear. _I can’t help but love you,_ Kyungsoo thought, aggressively as if Kris could hear him if he tried hard enough. _Even though I try not to._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the usual: thank you so much for taking time to read my garbage! please check out my other works if you like my writing style! my tumblr is [here!](http://www.angelzitao.tumblr.com/ask). 
> 
> If you want to support a poor lesbian college student who wants nothing more than to spoil her gf and friends, here's my [Buy Me a Coffee Link!](https://ko-fi.com/N4N47MXU) Please only donate if you want to and if you are able!! I don't expect anything but I did get a few people asking how they could support me so I set a page up. 
> 
> Thanks again! see you all soon ^^

**Author's Note:**

> thank u for reading! if u like my writing, go check out my other works. If you like exo and angst especially, make sure to check out my little [subaek fic](http://archiveofourown.org/works/7033417) and if you want a heckton of smut mixed in with all of that, take a look at my [exo fucktoy!au](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8324098) as well.
> 
> you can find me on my tumblr [here](http://www.taeyeonsholidaynight.tumblr.com/ask)!


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